Embracing Growth and Reflection in Dating: A New Approach for the New Year

by | Jan 1, 2024 | Ask the Matchmaker, Best Matchmaker, Holidays

As the calendar turns, many of us find ourselves embarking on a journey of self-improvement, commonly known as New Year’s resolutions. While these resolutions often focus on tangible goals like hitting the gym more frequently or saving money, there’s one aspect of our lives that often gets overlooked: dating. Instead of setting rigid resolutions this year, why not take a more introspective approach by prioritizing growth and reflection in your dating life?

At South Carolina Matchmakers, we understand the significance of personal growth when it comes to finding meaningful connections. Rather than fixating on external benchmarks of success, we encourage our clients to delve deeper into their own emotional intelligence and self-awareness. Here are some ways to embrace growth and reflection in your dating journey this New Year:

  1. Explore Your Values: Take some time to reflect on your core values and what truly matters to you in a partner. Are you looking for someone who shares your passion for adventure, or perhaps someone who values honesty above all else? Understanding your own values will help guide you in finding a compatible partner who aligns with your vision for the future.
  2. Practice Self-Compassion: Dating can be challenging, and it’s easy to be hard on yourself when things don’t go as planned. Instead of dwelling on perceived shortcomings or past mistakes, practice self-compassion and kindness. Treat yourself with the same empathy and understanding that you would offer to a close friend facing similar struggles.
  3. Step Out of Your Comfort Zone: Growth often occurs outside of our comfort zones, so don’t be afraid to try new things in your dating life. Whether it’s trying a matchmaker, trying a new hobby, or initiating a conversation with someone you find intriguing, pushing yourself beyond familiar boundaries can lead to personal growth and unexpected connections.
  4. Reflect on Past Relationships: Take some time to reflect on past relationships and the lessons you’ve learned from them. What patterns or behaviors have contributed to the success or failure of your relationships in the past? Use these insights to inform your approach to future connections and to avoid repeating past mistakes.
  5. Cultivate Authentic Connections: In a world dominated by superficiality and online dating apps, prioritize authenticity in your interactions with others. Be genuine in expressing your intentions and interests, and seek out partners who value authenticity as much as you do. Authentic connections are built on mutual respect, honesty, and vulnerability.
  6. Focus on Personal Growth: Ultimately, the most fulfilling relationships are those that complement and support our own personal growth journeys. Instead of seeking validation or fulfillment from external sources, focus on cultivating a strong sense of self and pursuing your own passions and interests. When you prioritize personal growth, you’ll attract partners who appreciate and admire your authenticity and ambition.

This New Year, let’s shift our focus from rigid resolutions to a mindset of growth and reflection in our dating lives. By embracing our own personal evolution and nurturing authentic connections, we can create meaningful relationships that enrich our lives and bring us closer to finding the love we deserve. At South Carolina Matchmakers, we’re here to support you every step of the way on your journey to finding lasting love.

Holidate to Remember

Holidate to Remember

by | Dec 16, 2019 | Holidays

When the weather outside is frightful, snuggling with your loved one is more delightful! The holidays are in full effect, and while your social calendar may be filling up with holiday mixers, office celebrations and Ugly Christmas Sweater parties, nothing beats one on one time with your love. Get ready to fa la la la in love all over again because we’ve prepared the perfect holi-date for you and your Santa Baby. 

First things first. Ask your partner what his favorite holiday movies are and add them to your lineup. We all have our favorites from child- and adulthood, so while you’re planning a special movie marathon, make sure your sweetie knows he’s being considered. There are so many genres and subgenres to select from, but we’re sticking to the romance and holiday theme. We’ve listed a few of the ones we can’t live without for inspiration. 

Holiday Romance Movies

  1. Best Man Holiday
  2. The Last Holiday 
  3. The Family Stone 
  4. The Preacher’s Wife
  5. Ghosts of Girlfriends Past

Holiday Favorites 

  1. Elf
  2. Holiday Affair
  3. This Christmas 
  4. Love Actually 
  5. Home Alone 2

Romance Movies We Love

  1. Love Jones
  2. P. S. I love you 
  3. Poetic Justice 
  4. The Notebook
  5. The Vow

*50 Shades Trilogy

Now let’s talk setting, food and fun. Movie nights usually consist of junk foods, dark rooms and plenty of pillows to go around. But with the magic of love in the air, we recommend adding a little Christmas spirit with decorations and plenty of mistletoe. Keep the room dark and comfy, but make sure your tree is lit or that there are lights hung to give the room a nice glow. Enhance the food table with a tablecloth and scattered candy canes, Forrero Rocher, Hershey’s kisses and seasonal Reese’s cups. You can even make naughty and nice cocktails. This romantic movie night can be as fun or sexy as you want it to be. Every couple is different, so keep an open mind and read-on for more ideas on how to make this holi-date one to remember. 

The New Couple

This pair is in the beginning stages of their romance. With only a few dates under their belt, this evening would be the kickstart to their intimacy. They don’t mind a little romantic ambiance, but they want to have fun and see where the night goes. 

Attire 

Plan to wear your favorite holiday shirt or ugly sweater and have matching Christmas socks you both can wear that night. Keep things fun by adding antlers or a Rudolph nose to your look and be camera ready for a not-so-impromptu photo-op during the slow parts of your movie. 

Food & Drink

Order in! Delivery services are a God-sent during cold winter nights. Spend more time with your date and less time preparing dinner. Decide what you both want, and have it delivered as soon as or before he arrives. If your takeout arrives late, be prepared with a meat or veggie tray and a bottle of wine. You can even make a few sugar cookie Jell-O shots beforehand to settle any nerves you and your new boo may have. 

The Casual Couple

This couple is all about comfort and joy. These two are in a loving, steady relationship but could really use a romantic date to relax and enjoy each other’s company. 

Attire

Wear matching pajamas! Now before you roll your eyes or stop reading because you think it’s a corny (but cute) idea, hear us out. It doesn’t have to be the holiday-pattern pajamas you see couples on social media wearing. While there are some nice, couple-friendly ones available, you can also wear a silk gown or shorts set and get matching boxers or pants set for him. There are tons of choices and all are easy to put on and take off! 

If your romantic pajama movie night gets a little boring, have a few games lined up to play. The whipped cream bubble gum challenge is a little messy but lots of fun; and there’s jingle bell toss (beer pong w/ spiked eggnog) or naughty/nice sensual couples’ games to add a little vava voom to your evening. Whatever you do, keep things fun and go with the flow of your evening. Spending time together is all that matters. 

Food & Drink

Have a smorgasbord of holiday goodies for you and your baby love. Your spread should include but not be limited to holiday Chex Mix, Christmas kiss cookies, popcorn, and your favorite pizzas. To make your stress-free movie night complete, have holly-jolly punch, peppermint cocktails or hot chocolate milkshakes prepared and ready at a moment’s notice. 

The Couple of Love Birds 

This dynamic duo has been in it for the long haul. They’re no strangers to intimacy but have fallen into a comfortable routine that rarely includes date nights. This couple needs a romantic night (or weekend) to reignite their passion for each other. 

Attire 

Surprise and seduce your love with a sexy outfit that will stop him in his tracks. Pair a Santa hat with red, black or white lingerie or grab a naughty Mrs. Clause costume. Either way, you want to make sure he won’t be able to keep his eyes (or hands) off you for long. Have a little something for him too. Santa boxers or peekaboo holiday-themed underwear are perfect options. 

Food & Drink 

Set the mood with frozen grapes, chocolate covered strawberries and champagne! Who says you need to wait until Valentine’s Day? Enjoy these sweet treats throughout the night. 

You lovers should start your movie night with a candlelit dinner. This can be steak and lobster, chicken Parmesan, stir fry or your favorite dish. The meal itself is less important than the ambiance you create. Make a playlist beforehand that includes your favorite slow jams and Christmas love songs—keep it playing through dinner. And for dessert? Well you of course!

During your movie marathon, you may want to give him a massage or have him rub your feet. With you in sexy lingerie and him half naked, you two may not even make it through the first movie without a little lovemaking—that’s one way to get on Santa’s Nice List.